Warning: Some Violence and Much Strong Language.HE WROTE: Cherry Bombs
Having not eaten all day I can be excused for not making sense but I really, really like Cherry Bombs as the collaboration thing, whatever the thing is.
It fits the logo, doesn't it?. Uh, doesn't it?
So. Book tour. Nationals. That's the motif. And I haven't even checked with Jennie. Because her and I have, man, I can't think of the word, my brain, fuzzy, such, that's the word, such a tight working relationship, that I know she'll be good with this.
Cool. Um. What day of the week is it? I just got an email we're doing an interview tomorrow with the Louisville newspaper but isn't tomororrow like, Sunday? Hey. I found the Russian. Hopefully she'll be there tomorrow to cut my hair. We'll see. And what, like, country am I in? And who are those clowns climbing out of the water? Man the machineguns men. Clowns on the beach and in the wire!
Detonate the Cherry Bombs!
19 Comments:
Wow. You're the first Green Beret I've ever seen get silly under stress. In writing, that is. There are worse things than clowns, but not many.
I'll have to agree about the clowns. They're pretty much the worst thing. All that laughter and joy and color. Eek. Seriously, a big phobia of mine from way back.
Bob, I think you need a nap and a little blue pill. Or the other way around. We'll even give it to you in a chocolate-covered cherry, just please, please, calm down for a minute. And eat something, damn it.
Join the club--I have no idea what day it is most of the time. I just know school times and if a child is missing to go pick them up. But spring break has me foxed.
I really think sanity is overated.
PS. Hate clowns. Freaky old men in dress up.
I don't know which thought is scarier:
Bob "In the darkness, there is death" Mayer getting a sugar high on chocolate covered cherries
or
Bob "In the darkness, there is death" Mayer getting light-headed and dizzy and confusing reality with machine gun clowns.
I really really hope someone brings along a DVD (Jenny, I'm looking at you) to record all of the antics for future blackmail, er, history. Have a DVD extra for the blog book and it'll make a fortune.
Spartacus sent for the clowns.
yikes, I meant digital recorder above. So much for proof-reading.
FRIDAY. Tomorrow is FRIDAY.
Give the Russian chocolate covered cherries and stay AWAY from her scissors.
What day it is may be relative to where you are when reading the blog. Just pretend.
Don't forget to spring ahead on Sunday, the real one not the imagined one.
Sweetie, go fix yourself a snack like crackers and cheese and then take a nice nap. You'll wake up feeling all manly and sane again. In the meantime, don't make any postings. You will only support Jenny's editor's nasty first impression that this was a "pool boy" situation.
I guess this would be a bad time to ask when you next Hilton Head Writer's Retreat is going to be. ;)
Hang in there. And what works for me on the days of the week..When you get up in the morning check the day with the TV or the computer and write it on a couple sticky notes. Put one on the fridge (where you'll see it everytime you get a beer) and one that you'll see when you flip open your wallet. Don't do more than that or soon you'll be looking at old ones, more confused than ever. -Jeanne
Bob, if you're going to take those allergy meds, you really should *eat*. Because your brain will be less fuzzy that way. Really...
Of course, I do like detonating the Cherry Bombs...
And on that note, it's time to go and corrupt young minds once again.
I think you should take advantage of altered state and write!! Not just this blog - another book. That psychadelic stuff should be taken advantage of. Keep it aside for the times when your high on starvation and allergy meds. It'll be a blast.
What is it with clowns? Why all the make-up? What are they hiding? Huh? Ever wonder what they have stuffed in those giant shoes? Hmmm? Has homeland security checked these guys out? Hate em.
Detonate the Cherry Bombs!
Be afraid. Be very afraid.
Aagh! My life is full of clowns only problem is they come disguised as normal human beings. No big round red noses, no gigantic shoes, no loud clothing... oh, nix that one, I live in the desert. That's golf country, hee hee. The louder the better, right? nothing like being hit on by seventy year old clowns. Anyway Bob, you sound weird. EAT!!!! Did you know today was national hot dog day? Who thinks this stuff up, anyway? So go, have a hotdog, celebrate.
Regarding the clowns...don't worry, folks. Bob's just been boning up on his Seinfeld episodes again. He's channeling Kramer on this one.
Bob, please go eat, you're using exclamation points.
Oh, boy. You know, Bob, Cosmopolitan has warned their readers never to drink and dial. I imagine the same type of warning should be extented to woozy pills and keyboards. The allergy meds are messin' with your calm, cool and collected "Movement draws fire" persona.
On the other hand, you've got the Cherry Bombs to Poor Baby you, so you're set.
Lily
I can see the caffeine deprivation has already set in.
Whoa! I've developed super powers. I just sneezed and shut the radio off. Now how can I use that to my advantage?
Uh, and I'm not on meds, either.
Jenny, how did you manage to come up with the magic formula to attract clown haters? I too hate and distrust them. Freaked me out as a kid. Like Mickey etc. at Disneyville, why were those people hiding inside those costumes? They were surely not to be trusted. Paranoid? Moi? Little moi? Heh.
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