Warning: Some Violence and Much Strong Language.HE WROTE: Stand In The Door
The thing about an airborne operation was 'preparing to prepare.' The actual jump lasted maybe twenty to thirty seconds. Maybe less depending on AGL drop altitude. But the operation lasted around twelve hours even if it was just a training jump with nothing else attached to it like a mission on the other end of the jump. Say it was a night, combat-equipment jump. (as opposed to a 'hollywood' jump. Hollywood meaning no equipment. Easy one. Well, nothing's easy when you're falling out of the sky). Jump time scheduled for 0100. One am. So they'd say show up at 1600. Four in the afternoon. Just to make sure you're there. For an 1800 jumpmaster briefing. Then you go out the airfield to do pre-jump training. Then you draw chutes. Then you rig. Then you go through JMPI-- jumpmaster inspection. Then you sit around on the green ramp. Then maybe the plane shows. Maybe not. Depends how the pilots feel. Nothing like the smell of prop blast jet fuel. Then you get on the plane. Then the plane flies around. Then maybe the plane gets lost. Maybe not. Then maybe the pilot finds the drop zone. Maybe not. Then maybe the winds are too high, Maybe not.
So then you get your ten minute warning from the jumpmaster.
Then the six minute warning.
Then the doors open or the ramp opens.
Then "get ready."
"Outboard personnel stand up."
"Inboard personnel stand up."
"Hook up."
"Check static lines."
"Check equipment."
"Sound off for equipment check."
"Stand in the door."
"Go."
Well. We're standing in the door, relatively speaking.
Sept 2004 we agreed to collaborate.
Jan 2005. First draft done.
August 2005 Final rewrite done.
Standing in the door.
3 April 2006. Green light. Go. Book coming out.
I'm tired.
But you see, here's the deal.
There's a mission on the other end of the jump.
You get this big adrenaline rush of the jump. Then you hit the ground. And you're alive and nothing's broken. And you lie there for a second, a very brief second and savor the feeling. Then you gotta get up. Get your weapon ready. Get your harness off. Roll up your chute. Get your gear ready. And get going on your mission. So it doesn't matter how tired you are. Because it's time for the mission.
19 Comments:
This is how I felt about pregnancy. Nine loooooong months of preparation and then JUMP into parenthood. What a ride!
So, you're not flying commercial airlines for this tour? Heh. Does Jenny know she's got to jump out of a plane? How many times in the next few months?
Seriously, with that analogy, I don't think I'd ever go on a book tour. And the only way I'd ever jump out of a perfectly good plane was at gunpoint, convinced they'd shoot me, and wrapped around someone else who knew what they were doing.
Aren't you glad you don't have to go booktouring with me?
Ah. I get it now. Agreeing to write was the prep. Writing the book was the jump. Landing alive and unbroken is the publication of DLD.
Meeting your fans and signing books is a combat mission.
Thanks, Bob. I feel so loved.
Enjoy the adrenaline rush and remember what you tell all of your students--"This is my one shot". Savor the ride of your "one shot" because it's going to be one hell of a ride and in the end you'll come out on top with your mission being a success. Just remember you have people behind you, routing for you on your mission. Even if you jump into quicksand.
So is this the part where we ask if you still think the man is more important than the mission?
Flippin' 'eck, I know that you have to psych yourself up flower but that was a bit "in the darkness, there is death", wasn't it? I'm beginning to see where the "drama king" remark comes from.
You could just try doing what everyone else does - get up, get ready for work, go to work, smile, do work - "Crusie/Mayer"-"Romance Adventure"-"Don't Look Down"- grin, finish work, go home. Have a beer on the dock, looking at the sunset. Job done.
Seriously, aim for enjoying the experience. Why does it have to be grim? The book is going to do - is already doing - amazing well. It's currently at #902 in the UK Amazon chart and this in late March (ie outside beach reading weather), for an unpromoted hardback that's not even out yet!
So enjoy the praise and flirting with all those lovely women who want to Sharpie their wicked ways up your utility kilt and relax into it a bit.
Less darkness/death, Bob - more Sharpie up the kilt. That's the ticket.
Cool analogy.
It does beg me to ask why anyone would jump out of a perfectly good airplane (an oxymoron to those of us who are flight challenged).
So, I'll venture a multipart answer: you do it because (1) it's there, (2) you love it, (3) it is part of who you are and what you do, and of course (4) because Jenny just may push you out anyway!
Well, nothing's easy when you're falling out of the sky
Surely not. I thought gravity at least took care of the actual falling part for you? Learn something new every day.
Seriously, best of luck with the mission -- er, book tour. At least your chances of getting shot at will be fairly slim. I hope.
"Meeting your fans and signing books is a combat mission."
If Bob shows up in a camo kilt it could well become a combat mission. He will have to defend his honor against wild women with sharpies!
If Bob is going to be wearing the kilt while jumping out of the plane, we are going to be massed on the landing field staring upward....
Talpianna is quite right; movement draws fire. Hehe.
You know, instead of all this combat mission stuff, why don't you tell us the Korean restaurant story? Maybe it will calm you down.
Wow, you and Jenny ARE really different, aren't you.
I suppose you could compare the parachuting experience to childbirth: nine months to gestate and plan, way to long to labor and birth, a few brief exultant minutes to sort of grasp that you lived through it, and then the mission.
OMG! That will teach me to read the other comments before posting!
What can we, as those fans, do to make the mission easier and/or more successful? I mean, besides showing up. Like, ask good questions? (Any in particular you'd like to see lobbed your way?)
As the tour progresses & you've answered the same ones 967 billion times, maybe post some new questions you'd like to hear instead?
Would you like to be met with homemade cookies? If so, what types?
I, too, don't really understand the panic. As a veteran business traveler myself I can acknowledge that, yes, it will be exhausting by the end, but it's only 1 month and then you can take some R&R afterwards (and should). I'm sure you've both undergone such endurance tests before and recovered. Yes, you'll have to converse with strangers, but most people you meet will be fans who will be eager to like you--and many of us will have been reading this blog and will understand if your brains are leaking out of your ears. You'll meet good people and nasty people on this tour, but that's not different from life in general. Where's the reason for panic?
After all, keep in mind (as the Electric Landlady pointed out) at least no one will be shooting at you (unless it's Jenny).
And do keep posting during the tour and let us know if there's anything we can do to help. We're here for you!
What exactly is "pre-jump training?" I'm guessing that prior to the mission they cover the basics. I have this image of all you standing around jumping up and down in place yelling Geranimo! with a Big Cheese saying "yep just like that only it takes longer to hit the ground."
I think I get the analogy. I suppose jumping out of a plane is kind of like publishing a book. There's a lot of training and preparation and trust involved. Plus there's a rush.
Just like jumping out of a plane you have to be aware of the unknown elements. That doesn't mean you jump thinking you won't make it, you're just aware. The same as publishing the book. Once it hits the stores it's pretty much subject to the elements. You don't have much control but you have to trust. You know you have a good product, you've both done the best you could do and you had fun doing it.
Now you just have to let it go and let it do what it will. And enjoy yourselves, have fun with this, it's your moment.
So like the jump, feel the fear and do it anyway. Soft landing. (grin)
Beautiful analogy! I know I spend more time worrying about an upcoming event than actually doing it.
Just check the equipment before you leap, and you'll be fine!
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